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resigning. [30 Oct 2005|07:53pm]

[ mood | hurt, hopeful ]

I miss this but I don't think we can keep fooling ourselves anymore; Jei's not coming back, Meiling's gone and we can't keep this proverbial fire lit.

I miss the way things used to be, but now it just hurts too much to even think about RPing CCS. It was a chapter in my life and I guess, now, it's closed . I have to move on before I sincerely wither. And I am. And I have. Moved on, I mean.

Zettai daijobu. I know you all believe that.

I want to do what's best.

Chins up, buttercups.

and, yes, i am forcing myself to do this.

for now.

because this isn't healthy for me anymore.

This isn't about me. It's just not fair to any of you. I'm never around, you know. Lol.

[05 Sep 2005|06:57pm]

;] riddles, much?Collapse )

A little more than kin, and less than kind ! Irises mirrored the dawn draped heavens, clouding at the sight of natures first parley with the cold -- retreating naked, stripped of its petals, stripped of its beauty. Ah, the sweet, pure, nostalgic aroma that was symbolic of the once humbled town; one by which he resided, and was emotionally attached to. At best, there lied a love-hate relationship with Tomoeda: the love, care, and respect he missed in those he left behind years ago; that overwhelming power that once was hated, now longed for; and .. well, the rest ceased to be of importance.

It's almost painful. Premonitions, premonitions.. nothing.

Lashes made contact with the bare skin, as darkness was where he best contemplated. How will they take the news? Surely, he couldn't expect Sakura to comply with his requests. Syaoran even less. While he had the respect and confidence of his once allies, they had all grown up -- matured. This was beyond them, beyond him. However, they did have a right to know the basics: who, what, when, where, the whole deal. Whether the would accept it or not, Clow Reed has slithered his way into the lives of countless .. the only thing he was good for.

Friends are forever -- yeah, right. They wouldn't need to do all this. This isn't a game anymore, this is .. life, our lives.

Moving on was impossible. This couldn't be foreseen -- fate's deed at its best. He was destined to return, destined to bear the secrets, scandals, and curses that came with the territory. And yet, he wouldn't have it any other way; excitement was bound to give him a taste very soon. All that lives must die, passing through nature to eternity. Hardly the case -- would it ever end?

He regressed from the skies, and onto the runway.
1 : Unleash the Power

it was reckless. [05 Sep 2005|11:30am]


important.Collapse )

The polished white marble of Tomoyo's mansion hurt her eyes. The sunlight was now a foe; it reflected and refracted off of any surface, threatening to blind her. Sakura's hand steadied in Syaoran's, and it felt like he was pulling her up the winding staircase. Lead by a head maid, they climbed Higher and higher-- she didn't remember it taking so incredibly long to get to Tomoyo. Why was she so far away?

Are we climbing to heaven?

"I'm sorry," Sakura murmured when one of the handmaid's left the room for tea.

Syaoran sat facing her, unmoved. "I was only kidding, we can't stay in bed all da--"

"That's not what I meant," she said a little more quietly.

There was a tap against the window nearest to them, where the sun hovered closest-- then a shrill cry and a tuft of down feather as four chickadees zipped past.

It was quiet for too long a moment. Syaoran's hands clenched and unclenched in his lap, his mouth opening when --

"Miss Tomoyo is ready for you now, Miss Sakura," muttered the maid as she reappeared at the door, two cups of steaming chamomile in hand.

Sakura reached over to touch his white knuckles. She was smiling. This was a good day. This was a beautiful day. She kissed him before she stood.

And left Syaoran sitting in silence.

Tomoyo hadn't rearranged her room in years; it bore the same bed linens, the same dressers and night tables -- the same hairbrush, coupled with a mirror and wide-tooth comb. Tomoyo was still water, safe water -- deep water. Dark water. Her black hair clung to her face and Sakura knew then, struck impotent in that instant, she had never seen anything more beautiful. So much like her mother. Tomoyo was so much like her mother.

She took a step in to the room and couldn't help but feel too close to God. This part of the house was bathed in white, smelled like ambrosia, and had a living, clockwork angel.

Tomoyo's lips were lifted in a weak attempt at a smile. There was a moment of Sakura simply staring, and then,

"Hey, you." She tried laughing.

Tomoyo grinned.

".. Hey."

5 s : Unleash the Power

sing to me the song of the stars [09 Aug 2005|01:53am]

The clock flicked; 12:03

It'd been about an hour since she called Sakura. No sign of her. No sign of him. There were times when her head pounded and throbbed, and she could have sworn there was a simple knock at the door.

It's too hot, ..

Alright, let me open the window--

No, no. It's freezing in here...

Mother had been telling her to get rest; after being unconcious for weeks, sleeping was the last thing she wanted to do. Even at such an ill state, her senses remained alert. Eyes catching every sudden moment, nose filling with scents of medicine and various soups. With the gentle care from her mother, she managed to keep busy most of the time --


A cellphone rang. Was that Sakura calling? Calling to say that she'd be there soon, with flowers in one hand, and Syaoran in the other? Sonomi answered the phone, muttering something about how important the call was and left the room. Business before family, once more. Her eyes closed, and she listened to the silence. And suddenly his face was invisioned. Would he show up as well? Of course he would.., Wouldn't he? His face would be dumbfounded, and he'd sit there on the edge of the seat, grasping onto her pale hand, not knowing what to say or do. His presence would be enough. If only... If only she could see him for a split second-- Or touch his face, run her fingers through his hair, hold him close and whisper that everything's all right... Everything's all right.


Never give up hope. She'd show, both of them... They all would. Because that's what friends do. She's probably still slee-- Friends? Friends. There was an old photo album resting inbetween the crack of her bed and the night stand. Fingers grasped onto it, and she lifted it from the darkness, dust covering both sides. She dropped it on her lap, letting out a gentle cough from the dust as a hand swiped over the top of it, clearing the dust off. Then the album opened, (shehasn'ttouchedthissinceelementaryschool) Sakura's face lit up the first page; she was blushing. Always been camera shy. A smile crossed over her lips, while soft eyes gazed over the pictures. A picture of Kero, eating cake, covered in frosting. A snap shot of Syaoran, looking irritated as Meiling Li, the fiesty Lotus, held onto his arm as if she would never let go. There were photos of people who had become distant, but remained close to her heart. Rika, Chiharu -- everyone, but there was one who stuck out the most. Her smile grew wider and wider with every picture she saw, but soon faded once laying her eyes upon one photo -- a certain boy. A smug grin on his face, such passion in his eyes, through those wide glasses. "Eriol-kun..." Her whisper only greeted with silence. Finger gently touched the photo, as if it would come to life. How grown up and mature he would be now. A fine British gentlemen. Tall and elegant. Skin the color of ivory. His voice much more mature and deeper now, still as mysterious as ever. The kind of mysterious which only made you curious, and craving more, and more ..


A sound distracted her. Eyes gazed up towards the window, wincing some. The sound came again, a bit louder than before. And then another sound, similar, joined in. Then another, and another, before a whole symphony was made. With the sun came something she hadn't heard since it began raining.

Song birds.
Unleash the Power

[06 Jul 2005|09:41am]

Drenched; .. the rain poured over every inch of his skin, soaking him through and through. Umbrella had left his hand, discarded, too cumbersome for use. The scent of plum had faded -- the rain smothering, keeping him back. Lost, the street lights gave no comfort or aid; only adding to his confusion.
A shivered breath rolled out, a prayer for his loved one to return, but the gods only answered with tears.
Numb, shaken fingers felt for the metal of his keys, only then realizing how the cold was affecting him. Anger and annoyance passed through him, and a jerk was given to the stubborn door, fist coming against it in fevered motions, as if his actions would open it. Own ignorance would be stopped at the hint of cherry blossoms, the concerned face of his sister gazing to him from open doorway, warmth bursting across him from the home. The warmth awakened his mind, it putting his body to ease, and a stumble was made into the heat which called him, dragging himself along the wooded floor.
"What time is it .." Almost rhetorical, as her words weren't heard, and at that moment didn't matter. Feeble steps were made to his room, fatigue clouding his mind as the last thing he remembered was wetness hitting soft sheets.
Faint whispers crept over his skin, the warmth of a body, and the hint of heartbeat resting with his own -- a sharp cry as his body jolted up, eyes wide in both fear and hope. A dream?  .. His plum was not with him .. her resting body no longer curled beside his as many times was the case. A haze of that nights events; .. dry clothes? Tired mind tried to recollect, but nothing came, a hand sweeping over soft fabrics; had Sakura done this?
The days passed; the rain, once a burden, now not felt. By the third day he was fired from yet another job, his absence inexcusable. A shell of a man he once was, the days were of him trying to do any and all he could, only to end up with yet another shattered dish, or the stove afire. Nights bred him an insomniac; .. sleeping only with her hand in his, head against her abdomen amongst visits. Soft kisses and even softer whispers graced the plums cheek and ear, resting forehead to the pillow beside her, in hopes he could bring her never waking body.
The doctors were of no help; their answers being only, "She will be alright." and, "Just let her rest." It had been over a week, and still she would not wake. Days became tiresome, and nights anxious; the urge of hunger had left him. Cereal would be the only supplement, .. an order from his sister. With all that had been happening, his nourishment was the last thing he wanted on her mind. Syaoran was back; Meiling had gone missing; and Tomoyo was sick -- what kind of brother would he be if he was next on her list?
Days rolled on, and the rain seemed to never cease, even for a moment. He hadn't heard the song of a bird for as long as he could remember. Flowers were in hand this day, a bouquet of cherry and peach blossoms; a sign they were both thinking of her. The comfort from the new umbrella Sakura had purchased, and a smile across his lips, .. and the rain would stop.
Unleash the Power

hold me now i feel contagious. [05 Jul 2005|08:29pm]

missive.Collapse )

"Are we going home now?"

It didn't feel strange or awkward to hear him use it like that. This was where he belonged now. Welcome back, welcome home. Sakura held fast to his hand.

       Rain rain go away --

The door. Careful steps inside. Syaoran kissing her fervently, distancing himself as he retreated back upstairs. I need to think. Goodnight. I love you.

       come again ..

Blinding, the scent and pressure of dinner that faded behind something much more powerful. There was a pale hand in her brother's hair, not his own, definitely not his own --- there was pearl polish, manicured, perfect. There was the soft silver ring Sakura had given out for a 15th birthday party, with wings and a heart and amethyst the color of Tomoyo's eyes, ..

There was clatter,


color in her mind separating -- a mix of molding purples and deep honey roaring back,

hands drifting away from skin, scolded.

"Sakura," one said.

"Sakura-chan," the other murmured. Soft and beautiful as the songs she sang when Syaoran showed her his plane ticket, when she was afraid and cried in this one's lap, rising later to smell like violets and geraniums.

                                 I love him

                  I love her

                       she's my

       he is


               number            one.

       I'm sorry.

       I'm sorry.

       .. come again some other day.

She was dreaming. Was this summer? The sun was behind her closed blinds, trees gripping the light like a thousand fingers, each branch a long hand. It was too hot and where was the rain?

Tomoyo stood there in a slip, curves shadowed in the satin. Sakura reached out. I've been so worried. Hey, you -- Hey!

Everything had ended in a splash of rainwater, a slamming door,

And absence.

"He's everything to me,"  Don't look at me like that. My heart is breaking.

"I love her, she is, ... my number one .." And we're sorry. But this is enough.

Tomoyo shuddered in a spur of emotion and ran.

And ran.

And ran

in to the dark where it enveloped her like her same fingers that had been there, tightening around Sakura's hand. "He'll be back before you know it," Tomoyo whispered against her cheek. "Everything will be alright."


is alright.

It will be alright.

But regardless Sakura was crying and running deep in to the black; path unknown and rain cloaking, hiding, desperately sheltering. Where was Tomoyo's light?

Won't she sing for me now?

Tomoyo. Come here. Sakura's hands stretched -- was Syaoran still by her side? Was this her room, draped in linen and high high in to the ceiling, were those crystal light fixtures? Come here please. I've missed you, were did you go?

Tomoyo never moved, hair heavy and black against her marble skin.

Your hair's wet, ..

Hey, you. Come here. Sakura sat up and grabbed at the lace around Tomoyo's arms, pulling her inch by inch in to her chest. Lips hung against Sakura's forehead, a dead sentence, a long paragraph of mute prose. Tomoyo's arms lifted and held Sakura tight.

Hey, you, Sakura mumbled. I love you.

The pong of a piano key, and the light overtook them both.

Real heat on her skin, now. Something drifting in from an overcast, dead sky. And then up and off of --

"Syaoran," she said, nearly too loud. He didn't move, asleep on her stomach. Wandering in so late at night -- a kiss, a clumsy hand beneath her back -- he had come to comfort her now. We haven't lost either of them, Sakura. We'll have them both back. Tomoyo probably needed some spac -- But not now. She had leaned up suddenly and they didn't speak again for a very long time. And she was aware of nothing but his pulse in her ears, his mouth on hers, his hands and eyes, blind, digging in to and gripping over her.

Then came eyes, his eyes in the sunlight. She hadn't seen him like this in so long.

"You're awake," she said, dumbly.

Silence, and then he muttered,

"The rain stopped."

She exposed her neck, curling around to see -- the window --

The Sun was confused, reaching out just enough to fizzle, black storm clouds whispering back in to place, threatening his shine. It felt humid. The light made it even more dangerous. Her fingers gripped against his shoulder blades.

And then the hum of the phone, vibrating -- jumping around on the nightstand. Syaoran, groaning, Don't answer I just want to sit here a while just you and me ---- but it was the Fur Elise ring tone.

And Sakura didn't think twice. The last note played and she reached just far enough not far enough, not in time. There was silence. Then a dull beep, Message Waiting.

Phone on her cheek, You have 1 new message ..


Syaoran looking up, chin on Sakura's diaphragm; breathing with her.


She dropped the phone against her pillow.

"Let's get up. Let's go," Lashes knit together, pushing against each other.

What? Wait--

"Tomoyo's awake."

They held hands as they walked out the door in to a much different world,
this reborn Tomoeda.

1 : Unleash the Power

[05 Jul 2005|01:28pm]

The freezing rain pounded against her body like a million daggers at once. She sat, leaning up against her front door; like a lost puppy trying to find it's way home. Breathing hard. Everything looked so dizzy all of the sudden. Her hands fell lifelessly to her sides.

The last thing she remembered hearing was one of her maids. "She has a high temperature-- Quickly! Someone call a doctor!"

Palms were sweaty, a damp rag rested against her forehead, and blankets covered her body up to her chest. There was a chair rested next to her bed, where her mother would come and sit to hold onto her daughters hand, hoping she would wake up. The doctor said she had some obtained sort of virus from being out in the rain, running around.

"Nothing too serious," he'd continue on, "if she doesn't wake up soon, send her to the hospital."

Who knew when she would wake up. Her mother mentioned something about the rain, ordered one of the maids to open up the curtains, and sat down next to Tomoyo once more. The power flickered, then went out. Everyone was use to it by now. The sound of a match, the flame of a candle, the distant tapping of rain pounding against the window-- Was the sound fading? There were whispers. You hear that? No, I don't hear anything. The rain... It's...

A beam of sunlight shone through the window, illuminating against Tomoyo's face. Her eyes winced, and opened up and stared into the hues of dark brown. She knew those eyes... Knew them from anywhere. "T-Touya-kun?" A hand, shaking, slowly reached up to touch his face -- touch his features. But as a cloud rolled over, blocking the sun, the image of the one she loved soon faded away. Sonomi came running into the room grabbing onto her frail and weak body, hugging her, holding her tight. She couldn't really understand what her mother was saying. Her head hurt.

"You were out for quite some time, Tomoyo..." She'd quickly move onto another subject, like she had so much to tell her. "You were mentioning Touya..." Her fingers stroked Tomoyo's thick hair out of her face. "Why is that?"

Because I love him, mother.

And suddenly the memories of the night Sakura walked in flooded her mind. She was silent. Her mother continued on, telling her about how her best friend and her brother would stop by-- more so, Touya would stop by, and how it looked like he'd been wandering around in the rain for hours. Whenever Sakura would show up, her little hand would be clasped into Syaoran's, searching for some comfort while he stood there dazed and confused.

Meiling... What ever happened to Meiling? So many questions. She need to be there, be there to help Sakura, like she always did. Sickness or no sickness. How much of a coward did this make her look like? "I'm in love with your brother." Then all the sudden she ended up at home, "sick." Her lips parted, "Sakura-chan..." And with little strength she had, and bad health, she sat up in her bed, feeling dizzy. A small gasp was made, a shooting pain flying into her head. A hand came and held her forehead. Sonomi was telling her not to move, that she still needed rest. But there was no time to rest. However, no matter how hard she tried, her body always seemed to resist. And again, she laid in bed. She looked over, grabbed the phone, dialed some numbers. Her answering machine.

"Sakura-chan? It's me. I'm here for you. Tell him... I'm fine. I'll be over making tea before you know it. Everything will be alright. Aishiteru."

She looked out her window. The sun was shining, the rain stopped. Yes, everything would be alright once again. A smile crossed her lips, hands folded over her chest, and she drifted off to a peaceful slumber.
Unleash the Power

[01 Jul 2005|11:44pm]


It was depressing. Not seeing daylight, for what it felt like; ever. The room was cold. An empty sense; everyone felt it. Doubtless the absence of light made it merely psychosomatic. Still, it gave him chills.

What's going to happen? seeped into all his questions; expecting for her to know the answer. Their desperate search over the last few weeks left them no closer to finding the lotus. And it was agonizing.
Food lost it's taste, sleep lost it's revitalization. The power faltered from time to time; similar to his faith. But she never once gave up on him.

And at the same time he was grateful. For her. She held him up, kept him whole -- other wise he'd shatter, into a million pieces. Her soothing touch calmed his fears. The scent of cherries increasing with her closeness. The smell alone calming his muscles, the tension in his eyes; the aching dread in his chest. She was like an essential oil, washing away the worry.

The bright glow of green; digital numbers illuminated the darkness of the room. Sleep found him easier than before. He'd pass out in her bed; the middle of the day. Waking into disorientation. What happened? Confused until the nightmare came rolling back into his mind. It wasn't a dream.

Soon he woke up. And it was silent. The house was still and his breathing momentarily seized. Pushing himself up, feet neatly slid into the green cotton slippers, shuffling across the wood plank floor. Hesitating, something was different. Pushing the drapes aside; he witnessed the absence of rain. Tomoeda still drenched by Mother Nature; streets slick, trees weighed down, black clouds low in the atmosphere. But nothing was falling. Was it a sign?

"The rain it--"
Then clamor on the first floor. Feet carried him down the staircase; speed hinted in his step. The oak framed door stood open, a silhouette of a girl at the threshold. Mei. Was he dreaming? Her figure was hard to mistake. Calloused fingers stretched into a reach, closer, relief in his eyes; expectancy to meet with those of ruby. Contact was made upon a slender shoulder.

He blinked, a rush of cherry blossoms invading his nose. "Your awake."
Confusion coating his face. "What's wrong?" Was it another dream; or just desperation to have her back. Optimism plunged down his visage. Perplexity present, doing his best to hide it. He pulled her into an embrace. Like he hadn't held her in months. The cinnamon strands tickling the brim of his nose. Weight on her shoulder, burying his face against the cream of her neck. Soft, comforting; home.

He whispered against her ear, warm breath traveled down her neckline. "The rain stopped."

1 : Unleash the Power

won't help me to do all that you dreamed i could. [27 Jun 2005|06:55pm]


ooc missive:Collapse )

The rain continued to fall.

Stiff minutes stubbornly drug in to hours that beautifully transitioned in to days. Late at night Syaoran paced at the front window where the curtains were parted, darkness peeking in like a frightened child hiding behind the drapes. Heat billowed from a vent, shaking the linen.

Stay here for just a while, just until .. The green in her eyes, the curl of her lip, had been too much; he gave in. Yet he kept his distance, distracted; Touya always hearing distance away, Syaoran's thoughts always absent, off with Meiling.

Her heart ached.

After the first day of dutifully scaling every inch of Tokyo Tower, both of them caught a cold deep in their lungs from the overpowering rain. Purple clouds thundered and ice fell like sheets.

"She always hated," He'd said, hand in Sakura's hair, "-- the cold."

She insisted Tomoyo stay, If it's not too much trouble. Which always means please. Every morning she'd see the shuffle of violet slippers and the swing of long black hair pass her door -- dazed, Tomoyo's face confused. So early ( only by her clock would she know; the sky never changed it's nightly facade ) that Sakura would roll over and wake up hours later with the sound of breakfast, Touya and Tomoyo reaching past one another for salt, Hand me the chopstick set, no the other one, Sakura likes the pink ..

Around 11:59, every night, her door would creek ( hidden by the deep drumming of the midnight bells from her Father's favorite antique clock ) and there Syaoran would be; barefoot, open shirt. Lost.


Then, mute, he'd come to her, drape himself over her comforter that wasn't such a comfort anymore and his arms would grab her up. Within moments the quiet understanding was replaced with a deep breath, followed by one even deeper, and then a smooth exhale as he'd finally drifted off to sleep in her hands.

And she'd lay awake all night listening to him breathe, afraid of the shadows that the light on her nightstand wouldn't illuminate, couldn't dissipate.

Couldn't overpower.

       "The power's out, .."


The days wore on and the nights grew longer. Syaoran went from not sleeping at all to sleeping too much, never moving beside her. Tomoyo's eyes grew dark, and Touya became listless. I have to work tonight. Late, he'd add, as an afterthought. Then a touch to her forehead, no smirk on his lips,

"Be careful, Kaijuu."

Swish of the umbrella,

rush of rain,

a slam of the door,

Tomoyo lowly -- slowly -- humming on the stairs

Syaoran so still in front of the windows, the wolf behind his eyes pacing --

( Sakura's heart breaking )

       And the rain, continuing to fall.

       And then, so suddenly, on the thirteenth day

           not falling

               at all.

Unleash the Power

an occurance. [06 Jun 2005|04:51am]


AKA, a little discovery. Collapse )

Unleash the Power

[30 May 2005|12:02am]


The desperate miles she'd tried to erect fell like moth ridden antique lace at her feet. It was in his hands and in his eyes that she felt the need to take a step foreword, be nearer. He drew her to him with a thought --

"Nothing, .." She was whispering, like the dark would break around him, fall like glass and he'd be swept up in the night just like ..

The Light was shifting at her command, down an adjacent hallway. It bounced in his eyes.

        "Nothing's going to happen."

She gathered him up in her arms, sucking him like a pearl from the mud, and held him so close.

The stupid power's out--

The power's, ..

Sakura's palm pressed flat against his spine. "You're doing all you can," she tried. His breath traveled down her neck, in to her collar and against her back. Her eyes closed.

A blur of black--

       she felt like crying.

The power failing –

       Was this her fault?

lightning shuddering, coursing. A clap as the cell-phone fell -- generator buzzing in to action for just a moment. Meiling, like a careful phantom -- disappeared.

She grew in his arms, stood on tip-toe to kiss his cheek ( feather-light, quiet ).  The chocolate in his eyes seemed to melt; the irises wilting. Her fingers brushed down the length of his listless arms; curled at the forceps, caught at last in his hands.

"Grab some things," she whispered in to the fleece as she backed a half-step away. Never too far, never too far-- "For the both of you. You'll stay with me tonight--"

He shot her a look. "Don't stay here," she mumbled, unsure. How could she explain it? How could she make him understand?

There was something in this house. There was something in this house and it took someone you love very much. And no, I'm not sure if I can get her back. But for you, if it's for you..

She's my friend. I'll save her. Just trust me just trust me just have
faith ------

With a sigh Light gave one last reassuring glow and circled back in to her left pocket where it would reform in to a light pink card.  In the dark he looked less tired, less alarmed and less lost.

But the fear, she knew. The fear had opened every pore and heightened every sense.

We'll look wherever you want to. Let's go to Tokyo Tower.

Let's tell Tomoyo and Onii--

Let's make sure everyone else is safe, ..

With a slow sweep she brought his wrists together and tugged his hands to her lips, kissed the white knuckles; her eyebrows drawn together in lines of distress. Confusion.


I will make this right.

Unleash the Power

[24 May 2005|03:30am]


She seemed distracted to say the least. Jade eyes avoided him, desperately seeking something; anything besides him. "You look pale." Cinnamon tress shook and fell against her shoulder blades. She disagreed, I'm fine. She departed from him but he wouldn't allow it. Spinning on a heel before she was out of reach, his hand connected with hers. Gently pulling her back to him.

He studied her eyes --- glassy and bright with worry, fear, lost. "Talk to me." He could read her; like an open book. Had she forgotten? Distress lined his features, a fine arch of his brow desperate for an answer. Magic radiated from her, strongly flowing from her hand, still in the grasp of his. Her skin was cold, still wet in areas. Some stubborn raindrops that rebelled from evaporating.

A single thumb, only keeping a few degrees warmer than hers, brushed across the rose of her cheek. Vaporizing the gathered rain droplets, or were they tears? The Chinese boy was just getting sucked into the moment; the realization of it all. Deep brown jumped from every feature of her face, almost like he was re-reading her emotion. Or rather thanking god that she was actually there. In front of him, flesh & bones. Not spiritually or fake; or invisible like Mei. A raspy tone fought against the dryness of his throat.
"If anything ever happened to you ..."

Distraught with worry his voice froze mid sentence. Warm lips closed again, unable to finish --- there were no words he could use to explain the suffering he'd go through. The pain and agony that would torture his body, soul, mind; heart. It would be unbearable. He couldn't live.

She came alive as torment glowed off his face. Disagreeing with everything. Leaving not even a chance of her disappearing. Knocking him into denial.

Her words for once, weren't enough. His voice over came the dryness and raised a level louder, discomfort filling his tone. "You can't say that, you don't know for sure! We thought Mei was safe!"

Shoulders dropped, face covered in defeat. "I couldn't save her." The fear enveloped his eyes again, what if I can't protect you? It wasn't audible. Completely spoken in the quietness his mind, to afraid to say it out loud. What if it came true?

His faith was faltering. Hope lessening and darkness winning. He didn't have her optimism; not now. And that's what made him envious of her.
    Everything will be alright.
He couldn't tell if she'd actually said that, or it was the "her" in his head speaking.

How does she do that? How does she always keep going? Trucking through the darkness of night, never giving up. Never giving in. Her strength, kindness, unlimited warmth. The ability to stay so strong no matter how far she falls. .... That's a gift. Something she had that no one else could. Someone couldn't just obtain, or learn that while growing up. It has to be in their genes, their DNA; their heart. And right now, he was jealous of her. Ashamed to be so defeated, be so guilty. It was his fault Mei wasn't there, and because he didn't even know what to do to prevent it from happening again --- scared him even more.

Unleash the Power

it's you and it's me. [28 Apr 2005|11:32am]


Fear caught up with her, was it obvious? Before a rainsong replaced the false calm of her warm home -- the cherrywood door creaking open, in spilling all the demons -- her grip was around an umbrella ( color lost on her ) and she was shouting down the adjacent hallway, voice nearly impassive. Something came up, stay inside -- we'll be back soon.

    Call me if you need me, she'd said. And then the door slammed shut.

     She was convinced it would never stop; the journey, the stinging on her skin -- the rain a thousand needles bruising her skin, the sky a lingering phantom. An umbrella had been a well-to-do-gesture, but it hung in her hands like a passing memory, gymnast's legs carrying her -- faster, closer; he seemed to be disappearing in her sight. All dark and black and gray, damp and distant. Tunnel vision.

The rain sunk in to her brain; her eyes, her hair, coursing through the marrow in her bones, the pulsing of her circulatory system, the beating of her heart. It was in this way was she numb, the fermentation in her legs doing nothing --- strengthening her, only an idle thought. Her skin was white, an illumination in the overcast skies; her hair heavy and clinging to her shoulders, her neck. She and the rain not so different now, both just a powerful thundering on the road.

It took either an eternity or just a few seconds, but there he was bounding in to an overhang, then up a stairwell three-four steps at a time. She inhaled cold air and followed suit -- was that Jump's magic in her thighs, clenching in her calves? Desperation disoriented her.

Then slow motion -- the click of his apartment door, the black that welcomed them. The silence. Syaoran bounded in, too fast and too deep, too quickly. He seemed to fade in front of her, causing her fingers to flutter absently over a deck of cards that was a necessary weight against the quivering of her thigh. Fear heightened her senses, and she followed suit -- reluctant, almost. Afraid.

She knew what she'd felt.

And she knew who she didn't feel now.

From too far off he called in to this artificial night, his voice aching, arching over her, past her. She shivered from the rain, she thought. But then the warm pulse of magic -- green, seeming, it was his aura -- radiated a false sense of security. A flickering light caught her eyes, punching a hole in the dark and she went to it, found his voice -- still strong, but weak with anger and a not so guarded trepidation. He seemed wounded.

    Light, she murmured, and a fluorescent achingly bright white flooded forth a good distance. A hum of energy buzzing.

And all she saw was the plush carpet, abandoned belongings. She felt like she was trespassing in Death's home.

    "Shadow wouldn't work," she explained, more to herself than anything. Not enough light. Too much darkness.

And wasn't that always the way?

    So he sauntered off, the ebbing warmth of his retreating fire draining the heat from her skin. She followed his dim outline and it disappeared in to an adjacent room, his voice replacing where he once stood, echoing against the walls. Against nothing but insentience. Lifelessness.

A cover was removed, a blinder in her mind. She fell quietly against a wall, feeling defeated. With a heave, her lashes falling, she called a silent plea to father Time; the card in her pocket a searing, blistering mark for a full second. The craft alerted her senses, her mind's eye replaying -- rewinding. There they were, fire and Light, then just him inside the black -- bounding out of the apartment, the door slamming shut. Then darkness, no Meiling and no power in the house, .. Her proverbial tape was a screen of night for a moment in time and then a flicker or two, and a spark of lightning -- then light. Finally light. A second later, her body excited, willing Time's recount faster ---- there was the cell phone rising in to the air, levitating ----

    and then Meiling, long hair like midnight. She talked, animated -- alive and right there. The scene behind her eyes froze. She found it to cliche to say Play -- and the circumstances inappropriate -- so she pushed further, magic allowing the scene to follow through. Meiling, older now, taller and leaner and fiery, talking and lightly annoyed. She was very much here, very much alright. Then a crack, something pressing and heavy in the air. A blur of black--

The power failing –
lightning shuddering, coursing. A clap as the cell phone fell -- generator buzzing in to action for just a moment.

And the absence of Meiling,

and the feeling of dread----

Syaoran was flooding her senses -- she heard his voice in this suspended animation, the trance failing too quickly. What is it, what's wrong I felt you use, .. And he was so desperate, distress lined in his face -- Light doing nothing to ease the look of complete fear.

Her eyelashes fluttered, gaze inconstant. There was silence for a moment, and then she made her choice:

    "No, nothing." It was bretrayal, even to her. "You checked in her room?" She pushed away from him gently.

Trying to justify a lie.

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Unleash the Power

[14 Apr 2005|01:46pm]


They ran most of the way there. The rain continued to fall. It dripped down his neck and saturated his hair. She'd grabbed an umbrella on the way out, but he was always a few steps ahead of her. The roads were deserted. Not a single car head light to illumine the way. They were like camouflage in the night. Feet splashed through puddles and kicked up a misty spray beneath his heels. It felt like an even longer trip on the way back.

Soon the large apartment complex came into view around the corner. The hallways throughout the structure had become dimly lit. Emergency backup lights holding a weak signal of illumination. Racing up the steps, he silently huffed at the high floor they resided on.

"I hope we have a nice view." Mei would say.
She always loved being on the top floors. "The lower levels are boring. They shouldn't even start the rooms until the 4th floor."
"But some people are afraid of heights, Mei."
She would look at him in a foreign way and snap back, "Well .. they should live in a house then."

He wanted to smile at the vocal memory, instead the determination grew to reach her. Fumbling inside his pocket, he knocked the keys around a few times before hands enclosed around them, and opposing digits held a tight grip around the door knob. A moment froze. Brown eyes turned to the girl behind him. She was slightly out of breath. It wasn't till then he realized so was he. "Are you okay?" Her head offered a quick nod, cinnamon drenched on the edges, weighting the strands down, dripping with rain water. He mirrored the nod before sliding the key into the dead bolt. It clicked. A free hand reached back and took a hold of the cherry blossom's while his body leaned against the door pushing it open. The power was still out in all the rooms. Blackness had over stayed it's welcome.
       "Meiling?" Shouted into the darkness. Only silence answered him.

They advanced further into the apartment, walking past the lotus' untouched black sandals which she had kicked off and placed neatly in the foyer. Releasing his hand from Sakura's, he entered the other rooms the loft obtained, reciting her name through the emptiness. "Meiling?"

The boxes were scattered. Tape ripped from some, partially emptied. The room looked half lived in. She didn't get to finish. Hands drifted across the comforter of the bed, searching for anything she might have left for him.
"She's not here. Where would she--"

Twisting his stance against the carpet the small wolf treaded back into the main room. He withdrew a slim saffron slip of paper from a back pocket, and fingered it between his hand. Silently calling the Incantation, magic awoke and flowed through his veins. Coursing against his bones; pulsing in his marrow. The gift passed down from his ancestors streamed through the muscles of his upper appendage, soaking the command into the ofuda. Ka Shin; a chant which was mouthed by his lips, birthed a small blaze of fire atop the paper. The conflagration burned through the darkness, illuminating a soft glow of the apartment's interior.

Returning to the cherry blossom's side, her feet delicately paced a step on the floor only centimeters from where he'd left her. Magical vibrations emitting itself from her delicate physique, claiming her worry, fears; strength. Innocent jade dropped to the floor. Hands clasped around each other. A bend was made with lower limbs; elegant and smooth. What had she seen? Resting in her grasp was the last thing Mei had in contact with this world. The cell phone, which appeared to have been carelessly tossed against the floor.

Ivory hands of his own curled around the small communication device, a cold breeze chilled against the skin. The rain pounded harder against the roof, beating against his skull.
"Mei. Where are you?"

Unleash the Power

it's time to be wise. [05 Apr 2005|06:24am]


The darkness did not hinder her, magical prowess filtering through the night, attempting illumination. Melted wax trickled down the tip of her index finger, burning; then cooling, a hard outer shell; exoskeleton. Her lips were slack, or else set in a firm line of guarded desperation.

It smelled raw, the thunder and the lightning. Burning, a thousand volts of electricity raging in the rain.

    Meiling? Meiling--

It had been then. A separate rolling in her mind, a pre-darkness. Hands like wrinkled death curling in to her brain, beating against her skull -- there had been the sudden urge to leave. It was something black against the light behind her eyes. She heard a heavy sigh and a low laugh against the pounding of the rain -- which seemed to slow, fall -- deranged -- against the splintering wood of her home.

It had been dense and pressing, a whirring in her ears, like a train returning to port. Evil magics. Her fingers had tightened around the deck that bore her namesake.

And then there was nothing, and she was aware too suddenly of him, so far from her -- feet could have easily been miles -- the storm knocking outside was replanted firmly in front of her.

He was stiff in front of her, shoulders clenched uncomfortably. Pacing, he seemed to collect himself -- if only momentarily -- walking briskly past her. I'm going to check on her. I shouldn't have been here. I have to go -- he pulled it like a burden on his wing. Worry scaled over his skin, trepidation -- much more than concern -- pooling in his averted eyes. She had just enough sense to reach out for his hand before he was too far gone, spiraling down too fast. Too far away from here, from her -- from himself. Did he try to pull away?

    "Did you feel that?"

    "I don't feel anything--" His voice rose.

    "Calm down," Although soothing, her grip tightened. He rounded, face wild, eyes searching hers in the candlelight. And, after a second -- a long second in which did nothing for either of their nerves -- she whispered, brokenly. "That was it."

Realization seeped in the brown of his eyes, always her favorite color -- now darkened, deepened with fear.

    "That's what I've been telling you about."

Her grip released him, and he took a sudden step away from her -- thinking, thoughts racing. So worried.

So scared.

Another step and she all but blurted, "I'm going with you."

His nerves frayed, he did nothing to stop her. Bounding out of her room, it was all she could do to pocket her cards, press a quick breath over the flame. It drizzled, it fumbled out of existence, the darkness replacing it's semi-warm glow.

She was gone before the first wisps of smoke had begun to curl towards the air vents.

1 : Unleash the Power

[05 Apr 2005|04:56am]


The wind started to pick up. More violently than before. It shook the house; struts and nails creaked inside the beams supporting the structure. Shingles rattled, and windowpanes howled. Moans seeping through minuscule cracks of the home.

Lightening surged outside, piercing the sky with a bright flash. The electricity faltered, and sparked inside the small glass bulb. Then blackness.

An innocent plea of shock vaulted from her mouth and through the darkness, "Hooe!" A cute trademark she'd managed to keep in her vocabulary. "Yameru." Her delicate hands fumbled through the draws of the desk; coming dangerous close of disturbing the sleeping Beast of the Clow. Luckily the stuffed animal was a heavy sleeper. That was one argument the small wolf wouldn't have had the energy for.

Rain beaded on the window, racing down every time more water collected there. Carrying himself to the glass he observed the neighboring houses'. "Looks like it's out across town too."

It was dark as night out. Black clouds hung low in the atmosphere. There was no more glow from the streetlights. But soon, a glimmer of fire behind him. Her hands clasped around a candle, burning brightly, her smile not far behind. What perfect timing.

Then a familiar ring, customized just for her, broke the silence. Hands fumbled inside the pants pocket, and with a click her voice was clear. But only for a moment. Her words went in and out, the connection was frail. Stupid cell phones. He managed to grasp a few words. Pacing the floor to find a stronger connection. And then, the two were cut off.
       "Meiling. Meiling?"

A sigh of disgust at first. The face of phone read: Call lost. He redialed the memorized number, and relocated himself to a different part of the room. The solitary sound from the other line was an irritating disconnected pulse. Brows furrowed at the tone. Pushing the redial button again. Same thing. Perplexity mingled its way onto the boy's face. A hint of alarm in his eyes.

Peering through the casement as though his cousin would appear outside before him, his heart picked up into an uneasy racing pattern, striking his soul with a dreadful feeling. His palm firmly placed against the cold glass, fogging an outline of his handprint.

Feet carried him away, deserting the window. Eyes didn't meet the cherry blossoms'. He hated to show her any vulnerability. An annoyed facade carried his face, an uneasiness resting beneath. "I shouldn't have left her alone." He redialed the numbers, anxiously hitting the buttons across the keypad, making sure they were correct. Not even a ring. An annoying buzz, like the line had been disengaged. Then, a second thought. Magic traced through his veins, trying to sense something, anything. But nothing. The amulet wasn't felt and a nervousness resided inside. "Something's not right. I need to go back there."

Unleash the Power

and spring herself, when she woke at dawn, would scarcely know that we were gone [01 Apr 2005|02:56pm]

The sound of the rain was echoing somewhere in the back of her mind as she moved. Like sky static from some unclear reception, the noise followed all that she did. Unzipping the suitcase and arranging the clothes in the closet, the thicker sweaters going into the dresser. The apartment was still empty, it needed to look lived-in.

She devoted the next hour to unpacking the boxes that had arrived ahead of them that morning. Dishes in the cabinets, throw-pillows on the couch. It was as she was arranging things that she noticed the black amulet resting on the coffee-table. Her cousin’s sword. His prized possession, and the thing he loved almost as much (if not as much) as his girlfriend.

Okay, so she was bored. Taking it steadily into both hands and inspecting the red braided thread that made a necklace of it, she could see in her mind the deftness he used. A magic she could never possess, enabling him to hold the thing in such a way that it could become a sword. His lyric—she’d memorized the action, the motion, the sound of his voice.

But in her hands it did nothing. She could go through the motions, recite the words perfectly, and she knew that no sword would come of it. Magic was a family commonality, even her kid sisters knew the simplest techniques—basic healing, temperature control; as they grew older they would learn more. But she, in the meantime, could only improve her physical skills. She could fight well, move quickly. But that was it. Nothing made her unique to her family.

It was as though some subconscious fantasy came to life suddenly. She looped the braid around her neck and toyed with the amulet in her fingers, daydreaming, pretending, imagining herself capable of even the smallest magical talent.

The lights flickered. Lightning flashed the room bright yellow, the rain was pounding and it was as though the sky had burst apart.

Then nothing. Silence. No electricity, just the gray drizzle through the curtain. She grunted, annoyed, and retrieved her cell phone from her pocket to dial her cousin’s number by heart.

The connection was weak, interrupted by static. “The stupid power’s out,” she managed. His response was garbled by an eruption of white noise. Lightning again, thunder that shook the stoic brick building. She was going to ask him if he’d packed candles, or maybe a flashlight. But her cell phone hit the floor with a tiny plastic crash. The lights flickered back to life with a whirr of mechanical power as though nothing at all had happened. It was as though Meiling had never existed, her presence gone from the building. There was only a cold breeze through the open window, and a curtain that wavered, uncaring, to the constant strum of static rain.
Unleash the Power

[01 Apr 2005|02:09am]


His heart skipped a beat. Almost stopped it's reverberation all together. A silent plead from his lungs to breathe again. She took his breath away -- literally.
Her touch, so delicate around him. Loose but sure. His stature remained still for the moment. Inhaling in the sweet scents she had to offer. Soothing, tranquil. Arms slowly enveloped her fragile frame. He always had a fear of breaking her. Warmth emitted from her cheek, heating his face. Chestnut follicles brushed along her hairline as the weight of his head rested against hers. The smell of cherry blossoms invaded his nasal passage. Lips resided centimeters from her ear, exhaling a warm breath that traveled down her neck. "I missed you."

He wanted to stay like this forever. Ask Father Time to buy eternity from him. Technically it was within their power. The Time could grant such a request. It was all to tempting.

Fluent motion of his hands deserted her body and came to cradle her face. Palms cupping her jaw line, soft digits slowly caressing her neck and ear lobe, wandering thumbs brushed along the contours of her cheek. Chestnut meet Jade, as if looking at each other for the first time.

Was he crowding her? He couldn't help it. With a surge of confidence; he bowed forward and slightly down, placing a gentle kiss upon her lips. And then, everything was right in the world.
The Hope glowed; he could feel it. Becoming alive, pulsating.

Her cheeks got hot against his palms. The affection spread across him. She was almost shy, cute; innocent. He gentled pulled away from the embrace. Running strong fingers through the caramel strands of her hair. It took longer for the process to end. They'd grown beautifully, falling against the cream of her back. Still soft and silky.

He was quickly becoming distracted. Who could blame him? Vision drifted to the window. Rain still pounding the glass, relentless against the earth's floor. He hoped Mei was okay. Speaking of ... "Mei wanted to come. She was tired from the flight." A lingering thought of his cousin rested in the sepia of his eyes. A tension that was on the back burner of his mind for weeks now. They still hadn't a clue of what the aura Sakura was feeling. How perilous the threat, and how close it could become.

Her hands clasped themselves together. She could read his worry. She could read everything about him. Petite feet carried her next to the desk where the cards resided. She looked at them, stacked accordingly, and smiled. The connection was unbreakable. Like a mother to child. Her hand wrapped itself around the top card and hugged it close to her chest. Her words were almost inevitable.
"Zettai daijobu."

Unleash the Power

[27 Mar 2005|12:44am]


       Shunned gaze averted the partial glances off-casted by his sister toward him, the longing looks between them only plummeting him deeper into hurt and anger. Arms loosely crossed over each other, folding against his chest; a sad attempt to try and disconnect himself from what was happening.

     Self-doubt would cause him to open his eyes long enough to catch his lovers eyes following Sakura's own to the doorway -- a tinge of pain inside his chest. Why was she looking at him? Especially when he needed her at that moment. Face hid away from both figures, the canopy of his hair darkening his face, leaving only streaks of light along slightly tanned features, arms dropping from their reinforced state to hand by his sides.

     Agilely avoiding the two, he would push by every so swiftly, only to stop dead in his tracks at the feel of familar small fingers wrapping around his wrist, his heart once more raising from his chest. Craning his neck, head lifted toward her, following the arm to the turning girl. Mouths moved, but no voices came out. Contagious bright eyes met his darkened ones, soft hair whisping by the skin of his hand with the turn, and he was greeted with a warm smile; a flutter of his heart.

     The passage of his sister directing the blushing boy happened too fast, even in this dilluted time, and he could only watch as they disappeared from sight.

          "Leave. . the door open. . " He muttered, unsure even why he was saying it -- as if Tomoyo was somehow forced her energies through him. Why was he letting them go upstairs? Alone. He trusted Sakura but. . Syaoran?

     The boy who had taken his sisters heart with him to another country? The boy who left her cries to echo and reverberate through the walls until this day? The boy who stole her from him. .


     Too soon the time lapse had ended, and he was in the kitchen, the once more timid girl before him, voice barely audible, her head low, playing with the protective cloth about her waist.

     A sigh heaved through him as he soon met with her, his forehead pressing to her own, tips of their noses barely meeting. Remaining still, his lack of action would be canceled as his lips meet softly with hers, rolling his tongue briskly across her smile as he parted it.

          "You have nothing to be sorry for. . " He didn't want to hear that. Not from her. And not right now.

     Strong, work-worn arms took her against him, lifting her up, perching her atop the cool stove top to meet her eye to eye. A cocky smile crept across his lips.


          "Well, shall we get started?" Grin. Dinner, of course.

Unleash the Power

[25 Mar 2005|02:40pm]

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